We talked about resentment last week and how important it is to recognize where you’re holding grudges so you can begin the process of letting go.
Nothing will help you heal, release and move forward like the practice of forgiveness. I think it can be one of the most misunderstood practices on our spiritual path. So, to that end, it’s good to remember what forgiveness is not.
Forgiveness is not pardoning unacceptable behaviour. You are not expected to condone or approve inconsiderate, hurtful or abusive behaviour.
Forgiveness is not putting a smiley face on something that still hurts.
Authenticity is an incredibly important part of the process. If you find yourself thinking you “should” feel a particular way, relax. Forgiveness, like other forms of love, must be freely given.
Forgiveness does not require you to become friends with someone that you’ve forgiven, (unless that person is you!). You don’t even have to speak with the person directly; it’s about releasing the negativity within yourself.
Forgiveness is not an excuse for feeling superior to the person you have forgiven.
Forgiveness is not an opportunity to get someone else to change. In actuality, this process has nothing to do with someone else. It is about releasing the hurts, anger and shame that you harbour within yourself.
Self-forgiveness neither excuses nor condemns you for whatever you feel badly about. You are recognizing that whatever the issue was, it is in the past and deserves to be left there. There is an internal ‘truce’, meaning that you are ready and willing to stop beating yourself up and move on.
Forgiveness is something you do for yourself, and is the ultimate in self-care. It says that you deserve to love, be loved, and enjoy your life to the fullest!
Listen to the Spiritual Message
Slides from the talk